HASH TRASH

H3SC Hash #106

And the sky opened forth. Or maybe it was a dark and stormy
night? I guess I'll just see what's on hand... "It's fun to be in
Ms. Frizzles class." If you don't have 7 year olds, you might not be
familiar with The Magic School bus. How ironic, when I was younger,
I always wanted to ride the proverbial magic school bus... I think the
generation before called it the magical mystery tour.

How did we get to this point? OK, I'm home, out of the shower and
still drinking beer. Better yet, I tevo-ed Caveman (My absolute
favorite movie not named Goodfellas) the other night. Why not grab
the laptop and review tonight's trail?

Showed up at the meeting point a few minutes early and there's no one
there. Its just starting to rain and the crowd is growing by the
minute. No beer, but, we do have rain and lots of it. Then a little
lightning and a tornado warning. Its Lolli's birthday and if
Spemaid's b-day hash was any indication, this ought to be a hoot.
Next thing I notice, Virgina Miner and Pat-E- Phile pull up and I
can't help, but laugh at how I rescued Miner's cheat vessel and bike
seat from that rabid raccoon I encountered on trail. I was able to
return the seat, but alas, I could not find him in time to return the
cheat vessel. I searched high and low, even rode down the street on
a flat rear tire to return that vessel. The closer I got, the faster
he drove as if it was some sort of grade school prank. Damn you
Miner, I will return your cheat vessel and force you to take it I
thought (as I pedaled as fast as I could). Anyways, I was able to
force the return of the cheat vessel and gave back the $142.00 reward
Miner wanted me to take. It was just a good deed. Don't make a
habit out of losing your vessel. I can't always be there to watch
out for you.

Next thing you know, Miner's got on a yellow plastic bag that
say "hazardous materials handle, with caution." Where do you get
this stuff? I should have got one from you. Save one and I will
humbly accept it as a token of your gratitude for returning your
vessel. Not that you owe me, that way you won't feel like you have to
give me the $142.00.

Off to Lollipop's and Kojak's house since the weather is so bad. Its
not raining as hard beachside so we decide to spread a little liquid
cheer and drink some beer. The weather clears up, beer is flowing,
why not run a hash. I can't remember how it came up, but, now Harry
and myself are thinking about a live trail in a few minutes. Its
down some more beer, grab some flour and off we go. Head east, round
the corner and throw in a countback square root of 169. A relative
sees me in her front yard writing on her driveway and asks if I'm
doing "one of those hash runs." She then explains it to an older
lady walking her dog and she yells "you got room for one more?" Run
around, throw some flour, My old house is right here and here's where
Harry grew up surfing and gettin' his mojo rising. Off we go, true
trail at A1A.. Nope! it's a countback to true trail! Those
dagnabbit hares are tricky tonight! Math problems? Count back to non
count back type of plops! Bastards! Over A1A and next thing we know
we're storming the beaches! Down to the Double tree, across A1A,
round the Re/Max office and 17 plops leading right up to the beer
near. The block of ice has a wonderful cooter ridge this evening.
Colder than normal as well. Budweiser, Miller Lite, Bud Select an
Busch fills the coolers. Almost forgot to mention Lolli's crazy
black bean salsa (the roasted corn made it over the top good),
Habanero Doritos, a tray of radishes and even some queso graced the
garage. Quick circle due to the late start. A good time.
Highlights of the hash: Toothfairy was heard saying he wasn't
leaving until all the beer was gone. Swax came back looking for Slow
Poker's purse. I suggest a Penis Hash the same night as the Bunny
Hash's bachlorette party/hash. Fin quickly commented that we need to
know where it is so that we won't show up on accident. Good One.
Slow Poker was also heard saying that yes he did have a Penis, he
just had to get permission to check it out of the house. Spermaid
keeping his pants up for once. Krusty, will yo please come to the
hash mre often so that he does keep his pants up! At least that the
way I remember the night. If you version is different, post it.
Just let it be known that mine is more accurate.

On out!

Snip It

Life's Lessons #82 When being chased by a large dinosaur, run to
the nearest marijuana plant, pick the marijuana berries and throw
them into the mouth of the dinosaur. The dinosaur will swallow the
berries and not get the munchies and then try and eat you. You will
be saved. Whoever kept a pot plant long enough to grow berries?
Come on, as soon as that plant was taller than your dick, you were
looking to dry it out and smoke it.